and yes you're in my head, but that doesn't make you here.

it is 3am on Christmas Eve morning and i am...still awake?





this isn't real. has an entire year really passed by? have i really just sat here listening to music and reading old blog entries - realizing how idiotic and oblivious i have completely been to everything happening around me for my entire life?

i am awake now. i am awake. i am awake.

but no one else is (except for win and regine, but they don't count at this point).
no one else is awake and i have no one to talk to.


they were right when they wrote "i like cars more than telephones."
i could take it one step further and say that "i like phone calls more than text messages."

but cars and telephones. i'm willing to take this drive, but i don't know if anyone else is. or if they are ready for me to show up there. or if anyone is willing to meet halfway.

to cry and to laugh and to cry some more until we reach the point where we can't even tell it apart anymore.
to embrace and not let go because its so comforting and so needed and so real.
to scream from rooftops that God is big and that life is normal and that people are beautiful and that we know a Love worth screaming about.

give me your heart to drive to and i will take that trip. make me need to.
my gps guiding me in the moonlight.